heartache seems to be a constant these days.
paris. beirut. kenya. and the thousands of others who suffer or die everyday without public outrage- nameless and faceless.
it’s all too heavy today. grief and fear and anger all tangle into a knot that just sits in my stomach. i want to switch off. i want to disengage. but it’s constant and in my face and i can’t ignore it.
God, what would you have me do?
i feel helpless and insignificant. i remember one of my toughest days in Cebu, where the evil of humanity was just so blatant to me, it made me want to cry and barf at the same time. and i railed against God- i gave it to him good- and then i was reminded of Psalm 94 and basically felt him tell me, “stop freaking out, i’ve got this.”
it’s hard for me to see how God’s got this under control when i read the news. it’s hard for me to feel at peace when i think about the shifting global environment and how close to home everything is getting. honestly, i lose sleep over it.
but at the end of the day, i can only rest in the few certainties i have: life is short and precious. we are all finite and accountable for our choices. and most importantly- good wins.